How Bad Moods Influence Communication

This is another quote I adapted from Pinterest and I chose it because of how it can remind us to be very purposeful with our words when we are in a bad mood. I mean, how many times have we said something when we were frustrated, stressed, or angry that we regretted later? And, it would be one thing if these negative words could be immediately taken back and erased, however, this is rarely the case. As this week’s quote suggests, those “bad words” can live in the hearts and minds of those we interact with for a very long time and minimize our ability to influence others.

The reason for this has to do with how the brain processes information. For those who follow my “Life from the Top of the Mind” philosophy, you know that the middle part of the brain (the limbic system) tends to scan the environment for signs of danger. And, when it perceives someone in a bad mood, it interprets that as dangerous and sends them to the part of the brain designed to deal with danger (the brainstem). Unfortunately, if we are the ones in a bad mood, this only ensures that they will continue to reject pretty much anything we say, now, and for some time to come.

This is why we want to ensure that when we find ourselves feeling stressed, frustrated, annoyed, etc., we know how to get out of this lower brain before we say things that we regret later. Plus, if our goal is to be influential with others, we must have access to the sort of communication skills and interpersonal skills that only reside in the “Top of the Mind,” or the neocortex.

The good news is that this is what I teach. I have the pleasure of going around the world teaching individuals and organizations how to know what part of the brain we are in, and how to shift from the brainstem to the neocortex (or the “Top of the Mind) when we want to access our best and communicate effectively with others.

If this is something you would like to learn, I suggest you contact me, because it is so much easier to engage others in a way that has them hearing what we have to say as valuable, versus having to clean up hurt feelings and angry reactions that result when we try to communicate when we are in a bad mood.